Crap E-mail From a Dude

Last month it literally seemed like mercury retrograde was in cycle and everyone was either breaking-up, dying (in the case of the celebrity summer of death), or just generally going nuts.

Lo, my best friend from college, fell into the break-up category of this bizarre trend about a month ago, and given the fact that her ex was infamous for sending the crap e-mail, I have been anxiously waiting for the break-up version. FINALLY, it has arrived!

While I don't have the actual transcript of the e-mail (apparently it was ridiculously long), the general message was this:

I believe in Karma. Someday you are going to find someone, and you are going to fall in love with them and they are going to treat you badly and break you heart. And when you are at your darkest moment, I want you to look back, and I want you to think of me.

UM. WHAT. Wishing bad karma on your ex in your own private thoughts or in a drunken bender with your best friend. Totally acceptable. In an e-mail to the EX? Yeah. It's DON'T.

This Is Hilarious!!!

"I want to do for rebounds what Michael Jordan did for dunks." - Dennis Rodman

The rebound is a lovely and necessary thing. Lets be clear the "rebound phase" does not mean sleep with anyone who asks. Seriously. It DOES mean getting yourself back out there, smiling, flirting, dating, etc.

I may not be a relationship expert, but I AM a rebounding expert. Post-Peter Pan, after precisely 4 days I went on a date with a nice guy who I had saved in my phone for a rainy day, (hey, I was in a relationship, not a nunnery, don't judge) went out for drinks, good conversation and a kiss on the cheek. We ended up going out roughly 3 or 4 times, nothing serious, just casual dating until it fizzled. Post Mr. Brown, I was in a more sensitive place so this time I waited exactly... 7 days. I went out with my best guy friend's friend from home (Yes, back to my rule of 3), whom I had met at a wedding 3 weeks prior (like I said, save these boys for "just in case", because hey, ya never know). A couple of lunch dates with a guy friend from college, and some drinks, I would say I am braced to be "single".

The most important thing in rebounding, is to take it slow, you wouldn't try to swim across the English channel after downing an In-N-Out burger would you? Nope, and neither should you full throttle throw yourself into a raging party single girl. Trust me, if you do this, you will find the immediate partying high to be filled just as quickly with a depressive low.

Take some time for yourself, detox, gym it, read, throw yourself into your career, and oh yes, find time to flirt, ALOT, you didn't forget did you?

Do You Fancy It?

The new layout, of course. Let us know if you love it/hate it etc etc at doyoufancyus@gmail.com. We will be doing a few tweaks once I finish the joyous experience that is the California Bar Exam so don't be alarmed if it things change up in the next few weeks. Thanks!

XO,

Em

"Elle, the Statute of Limitations is up on tears"

Em in all of her infinite lawyer-ly wisdom has informed me that my month for potential teary grief has expired. I haven't cried post-break up yet (I'm not bragging - I swear I think this is weird), and according to Em, my time to claim "uncontrollable sadness" has expired and I have waived all right and title to drown my sadness via weeping. Fair enough. So my month of "grieving" was filled with friends, fun, sun, and general happiness, which was is much better than mourning, weeping, sorrow and distress. I would say... wonderful trade off. I win!

Insult to Injury + Salt on Open Wound

Jessica, this has been a rough few days for you.

"Oh man, how weird must it be to have your boyfriend of years dump you the day before your birthday, and then still have to go through with the launch of a perfume called "Fancy Love." Which you have to make public appearances for, and see your own face on the ads of. Jessica Simpson, this is just not your week." - (Via Jezebel)

Like I've said before, breakups are rough no matter who they happen to, but dealing with one on the other side of the paparazzi lens, and then having to schlep some perfume about love. What did Jessica do in her first life to get Karma like this?

"Get in loser, we're going shopping"

Lust of the day: The Rope Knot Bangle from DYFU fave Vineyard Vines. Super cute yeah? Very nautical, very summer. Classic!

Hello Ricky Berens!

Happy Tuesday! U.S. swimmer and Olympic relay gold medalist Ricky Berens had a wardrobe slight malfunction (ed: wait - you mean the suit wasn't made this way?!) this past weekend at the World Swimming Championships in Rome.

In case you were wondering... his face is pretty cute too (On the Left during the Beijing Olympics last Summer).

Tony Romo, you are a jerk (Part 2)

The hits keep coming for poor Jess. In addition to the untimely pre-birthday breakup, Tony publicly banned her from his residential complex.

The Dallas Cowboys quarterback instructed security to keep Simpson out of his gated community.
A sign at the entrance reads: "RED ALERT!!! TONY ROMO HAS MADE SOME CHANGES TO HIS LIST OF PEOPLE ALLOWED IN....JESSICA IS NO LONGER ON THE LIST AND NOT APPROVED FOR ACCESS."

Ease up T, be nice! No need to pour salt on the wound, the most approp course of action for the dumper is to maintain a low profile and curb additional humiliation for the dumpee. Clearly Tony didn't get the memo.

Good Luck, Em!

Tomorrow Em will be taking Day 1 of 3 of the California Bar Exam. Lots of love and good thoughts are being cosmically sent your way!

XO - Elle

Lady Gaga - where are your clothes?

So I get that sometimes she forgets pants. And sometimes she remembers them, but then forgets her top. But no top and no pants just makes you... kind of naked in public. Love your music. Don't love your clothes (or lack of).

Imagine If She Was Your Freshman Roommate?

Emma Watson, of Harry Potter fame, is apparently enrolling in an unknown Ivy league school this fall to begin her college education. Imagine getting your roommate sheet with the name Emma Watson on it....would that be amazing or perfectly awful? You would have to believe her closet would be unbelievable. As for OUR freshman roommates....Elle was much luckier than me on that front. She got an adorable East Coaster (who I adore) who has remained her friend and roommate since AND I got a midwestern, trumpet toting, sex crazed, overweight marching band nerd who I swear TO GOD almost warped into the Bridget Fonda version of single white female. Very. Scary.

PS: Adore Emma. Chic, composed and classy.

This May Be Worse Than The Mom Jeans

If you've clicked past a news channel in the past few days or hit your bookmarked CNNonline, there is no way you could have missed the Harvard Professor/Obama/Police Officer debacle. Whether or not you love Obama or hate Obama, I hope we can all agree he would have been better off just saying "No Comment", staying above the fray and remaining on topic....you know, about he wants us to become the Sweden of the West.

Love this political cartoon I saw on Investor's Business Daily's blog .

Adore this picture

Why Is Katherine Heigl So Annoying?

Both Newsweek and Jezebel try to answer this question. Personally, I used to like her, especially in My Father the Hero, my all time favorite pre-teen movie (yes maybe even more than Wild Hearts Can't Be Broken), and in the beginning of Greys...and even in Knocked Up. What the hell happened and has her publicist resorted to jumping off a bridge yet? As for me, I think if she kept her mouth shut and just looked pretty, she wouldn't induce me to gauge my eyes out.

Click here for the Newsweek article

And click here for Jezebel's take

"It occurs to me that in order to fully appreciate New York, you have to believe you'll leave at some point." - Julia Allison

I never thought I would be in New York forever, and I still don't. It isn't until I find myself making real plans to leave that I get sucked back in, its kind of like that boy you can't really get over. Last year I made a real plan to move out west to Denver with a friend, the plan (on my end - She is moving in ... 5 days) was foiled when work picked up and I started dating Mr. Brown. Early this July I was on a path to move a little South an reunite with Em, this, too, was foiled when a wonderful career opp and new apartment prospects floated my way. Maybe its the Manhattan Karmic universe trying to keep all of its inhabitants within its orbit, or maybe its mere coincidence, but whatever it is, every time I think I reach my fill and I am ready to pack it up and head up, down, east,west (basically anywhere but here), something comes my way that makes it impossible to leave.

Hey Manhattan - think you will let me leave in about 6 years when I want to move to Greenwich, CT? I promise I will make my hubs commute in to see you EVERY day.

Posh... being Posh

Perfect sleek grey dress, perfect black CL's, perfect toe point, perfect hair bob. Love her.

"How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before. starting to improve the world" - Anne Frank

Life is short. Far too short to be cooped up in a job you dislike, a relationship you feel lukewarm in, an apartment you feel cramped in, or a body you are dissatisfied with. Make the move, the change, the big switch. Turn it on. I have to admit, half of life is luck and timing, but half is also you. Too many things in life are mediocre, your life shouldn't be.

Em and I are on the verge of FABULOUS changes. Big move(s), new job(s), new clothes. And it couldn't come at better a better time for either of us. SO MUCH to be excited about.

Re-focusing on the big picture with the help of the Fleetwood Mac station on Pandora, LOVE.

Interesting Idea....

I have no idea why this Barney's window display didn't go over well. I don't know about you, but blood splattered mannequins always make me want to whip out the Amex!

File Under: Things which are not practical

Sure this look is super cute if all you are going to do is hold a pose all day, but walking + those do-dads = MAJOR SNAGS. Plus, would this even be flattering? Artistic fashion is typically impractical, keep that in mind.

(Pic from Miu Miu Fall 2009 Campaign)

Let's Be Clear.....

NO ONE with an ounce of hip on them could pull off this dress. It is heinous and too tight and just AWFUL. Who would do this to adorable Blake Lively! She has a perturbed look on her face for a reason.

Jon Gosselin - Please Stop Wearing Screen Print Tees

One of my pet peeves? Men, or rather BOYS, in screen print tees. If you are over the age of 18, you shouldn't be sporting a tee shirt unless you are working out or doing manual labor. Get with the program. And paying $100 + bucks for a tee, well that just makes you an idiot.

P Dot S - That GUT should probably go MIA with the Tees.

Ed Hardy Tees : They are a don't. OBVS.

"Who in the hell is not ready for Roanoke?"

You've heard it: it is rough out there. The recession absolutely BLOWS. If you are currently unemployed or looking for a new job, it is not easy. But keep your chin up and think positively. I just saw this quote on Julia Allison's blog, and thought I'd share:

"I had one job interview in Richmond, and the news director watched my tape and said, ‘I’m sorry, you’re just not good enough for Richmond.’ As I was leaving, the guy said, ‘I have a buddy of mine in Roanoke, Virginia who will hire you. Drive there tonight and you’ll catch him.’ So I drove to Roanoke that night, and I met the news director there and he said, ‘I’m sorry, but you’re not ready for Roanoke.’ I thought, ‘Who in the hell is not ready for Roanoke?’"

- Hoda Kotb, Today Show co-anchor, who endured 27 rejections before getting her first on-air gig

Got Dumped?

For the past year or so, Elle and I have been (somewhat) following blogger Amelia over at the very popular blog The Frisky. After her fiance abruptly broke up with her last year around this time, she first wrote the "Break-Up Diaries" and now "Dating Amelia". Like any break-up, or car crash, it has been kind of hard to look away. Her most recent post about adamantly LOVING being single kind of made me sad, though, because underneath it all, it seemed really contrived. She was supposed to be okay, so she WOULD be.

After being dumped, or any kind of break-up really, there always seem to be a FORMULA of how to deal with it. According to self help books it goes something like this: there are the stages of grief, and then the rebounding, then obviously you remember how much you love to be alone, and then of course the requisite epiphany where all of a sudden you LOVE being single.

Right. Break-ups like anything else where your heart is involved cannot be that formulaic. At the end of the day, you have to throw away the "break-up" calendar's, stop listening to your friend who has never had her heart cracked, and do what feels natural to you, what it is that makes you happy. If you aren't ready to date, do NOT date (it will only make you feel infinitely worse). Finding someone new and remembering who you were before all the dark clouds and tears has to be more, dare I say, organic than a checklist on your fridge. It takes great friends, one too many shopping sprees, and sometimes multiple bottles of wine to feel normal again. Or maybe for you, none of those things will do the trick. Bottom line, you will be okay and maybe you will LOVE being single and alone, but like anything else, you usually have to craft your own way to find it.

8 is ENOUGH!

Ok, people. lets get this straight. Jon and Kate Gosselin are not real celebrities. They are not actors, athletes, politicos, hell THEY AREN'T EVEN GOOD LOOKING. What is the nation's obsession? They are just 2 regular people who didn't stop having children soon enough and now they are farming off their family in order to generate a revenue.

I am not missing a heart, I think its genuinly sad that their poor children are paraded through relaity tv land and that their father cheated (publicly) on their mother, but enough! This stuff (sadly) happens EVERY DAY all over America.

p.s. Jon's new lady friend...steamrolled by the ugly truck.

Grey Suits - Typically a Don't

Eric Bana is the exception, I mean, when isn't he? Grey suits are only acceptable when ALL (yes all) of the following requirements are met: 1.) The man is above 6'1'' 2.) The suit is high end and VERY well tailored (if its baggy you will look like its 1993 and you are try to sneak into the Roxbury) 3.) Its spring or summer

Clearly much more leeway is granted to suits that fall within the charcoal/ slate category. Strict rules apply to those suits which fall in the light dove grey schema.

Happy Birthday to Elle!!

To my cosmic soulmate.

XO,

Em

PS: Find more of these UH-MAZING cakes at pinkcakebox.com (esp. if you live in New Jersey!)

This Has Got To Hurt

A TV movie? Ouch.

This Makes Me Vomit

Reblogged from Jezebel:

Kelly Hildebrandt decided to look up her own name on Facebook last year, just to see if anyone else shared it with her. Lo and behold, someone did; a young man she thought was pretty cute.

Long story short, Kelly Girl (the couple differentiates by referring to themselves as "Kelly Boy" and "Kelly Girl") sent Kelly Boy a message, and the two started talking.

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

Who Would Play You In The Movie Of Your Life?

Thought this mental exercise of narcissism on Jezebel about what celeb would play you (dream and reality) is a fun waste of time for a Saturday night. Who do you think should play you?

Here are my recommendations for Elle:

Dream: Catherine Zeta Jones

Reality: Emmanuelle Chriqui (aka, Sloan from Entourage)

Em's Dream: Jennifer Aniston

And Em's Reality: Lauren Conrad

Love This!

"She's [been with] every hot guy from Brad Pitt to John Mayer. She's not tragic; she's amazing." --Kathy Griffen about Jennifer Aniston

Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else. -Judy Garland

Came across this quote today on one of my favorite finance blogs, "The Epicurean Dealmaker":

"So if my volatile ramblings insult, annoy, or offend you, do what countless others before you have done. Cut me off, drop me from your RSS feed, unfollow me on Twitter, and do anything else you can to erase the knowledge that there is someone as cutting, uninhibited, and uncivilized as me wandering about the intellectual landscape, or at least the little corner of it demarcated by Wall Street and Broad. Don't worry: I won't take offense if you leave."

Its fairly spot on, ya think? We'd love for you to love us, but it won't kill us if you leave us.

p.s. Don't be so snarky - its bad karma.

XO - Em & Elle

How Not To Be a D-Bag Post Break-Up, Celebrity Style

[Ed. Note: Has anyone ever been watching an Arizona Diamondbacks baseball game and you kind of do a double take when the commentator refers to them as the D-Backs...because I ALWAYS hear D-Bags....for some reason. Anyways, moving on.]

Needless to say, whenever someone (regardless of gender) is a total asshole, Elle and I tend to substitute the abbrev D-BAG in order to express our disdain. Take a lesson from these celeb D-Bags, and don't repeat their mistakes:

1. Tony Romo- What Not To Do A Week After A Break-Up: I'll just breeze past the apparent false sense of entitlement Romo has acquired from being the Cowboys QB and get right to his real douchebaggery (except to say he has been a constant disappointment and FYI Romo, you are no Troy Aikman). Romo dumped his girlfriend Jessica Simpson the day BEFORE her birthday and then proceeded to paint the town as a singleton the whole next week. Seriously? Lessons: (1) Do not dump your girlfriend the night before her birthday, even if she is annoying and having a ridiculously themed party. Break up with her at LEAST a week in advance so she has some time to put herself back together and (2) It is not proper relationship etiquette for the DUMPER to jump right into single hood the first day post break-up, especially which such activity will land in the tabloids. Real life application? Do not post photos of your fabulous 4th of July get together on facebook, you asshat. Have some class.
2. Jon Gosselin- Wait More Than Five Seconds Before Replacing The Mother of Your Children with Some Gold digging, Wrecked HO: As I told Elle, I was surprised how outraged I was at a reality star of a show I rarely ever watched, but COME ON GOSSELIN. I know you've been separated from you wife for a good three solid weeks, but guess what, it still isn't the time to be toting around your new 22 year old girlfriend around France- not to mention the fact that the new girlfriend is utterly wrecked. Lesson: Rebounding is necessary to move on, but have some tact for the love of God. Posting pictures of your newest conquest on facebook makes you about as classy as Jon's collection of Ed Hardy T-Shirts.
3. Brad Pitt- If You Are Cheating, Give a Girl Some Head's Up: And now on to the biggest D-Bag of them all, Brad Pitt. After dumping is adorable wife, Jennifer Aniston, Brad Pitt moved on quite quickly to his rumored mistress Angelina Jolie....so fast in fact, he knocked her up before Brad and Jen were even legally divorced. If you already have the next love of your life picked out, do a girl a favor and give her a heads up so she doesn't have to see the pictures of your engagement party plastered all over the internet 5 months post break-up. Yeah it sucks to admit you are a cheater, but sucking it up and telling the truth will at least reduce your D-Bag status and help her say goodbye for good.

Priceless

-Via Summer Is a Verb


Happy Thursday People. XO - Elle

Finance-stitute Crush of the Day: Jaime Dimon

Jaime Dimon, you sexy bitch. Mr. Dimon is CEO and chairman of JP Morgan (who BTW just posted a $2.7 BILL profit for the 2nd QTR) as well as a director of the Board of Directors of the New York Federal Reserve. Um Hot.

A male perspective

CJM: please, you were only with him for the facebook albums

besides being photogenic

i didn't see any lasting quality

Elle: Well

he was very good on paper

CJM: so was the 1980 USSR hockey team

Point: Elle

DIY: Do it Yourself Fashion!

Maegan is a DIY fashionsta/ genius, imagine all that high end couture (read: $$$$) being created on the cheap in your own abode, amazing yeah? My FAVE is her Louboutin Petal Shoe.

In The Spirit of the All-Star Game....

I give you my favorite quote from Bull Durham. Vintage Kevin Costner and America's Game. Love it.

Crash Davis: Well, I believe in the soul, the cock, the pussy, the small of a woman's back, the hanging curve ball, high fiber, good scotch, that the novels of Susan Sontag are self-indulgent, overrated crap. I believe Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone. I believe there ought to be a constitutional amendment outlawing Astroturf and the designated hitter. I believe in the sweet spot, soft-core pornography, opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas Eve and I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days. Goodnight.

Tony Romo - You are a Jerk

I would have understood if you dumped J-Simps for being... well J-Simps.. or for when she puffed up about 30 lbs, but to break up with her because you didn't want to participate in her Ken & Barbie birthday theme party? For fox sake, its her birthday (which I am sure you knew seeing as you dumped her with impeccable timing)! If you thought it was SO beyond the scope of boyfriend duties, maybe you should have broached that with her, and if that failed, suck it up. God knows she suffered watching you and your cowboys and their continual EPIC End-of-Season FAILS. You're a loser and the Cowboys are not "America's Team", FYI.

Speaking of... in 6 days "Its my birthday and I'll MARG if I want to"!

UM, Miranda Kerr, Why are you so pretty?

Um no really, seriously. And you know what? She also looks NICE, like not a bitch or a snob, just NICE. A nice person who is impossibly stunningly gorgeous, um, what are the odds?

Hello, Joe Mauer

As a good American, I am sitting here on this beautiful Monday night watching the Home Run Derby. Maybe I am just out of the loop but I literally just grabbed Mr. Em's shoulder and said "Whooo the heck is that" as Joe Mauer came up to bat. He rolled his eyes, but I do not care. Hello, Joe Mauer, you are adorable.

Just another reason to tune into the All Star Game tomorrow!

Stuff Em & Elle like...err...DON'T LIKE

So clearly Em & I have been fans of the site "Stuff White People Like" for quite some time, and today's post on the book "Where the Wild Things Are" , (truth be told I am not a huge fan of that book, I think it always creeped me out as a child), reminded me of one of my biggest pet peeves: Movie Book Covers.

I SERIOUSLY refuse to read a book that has the "Made into a Motion Picture" book cover on it. I am not so self absorbed to think that everyone is watching me and judging me for selecting to read a book AFTER it has been made into a movie, but, um, what if they are? In fact, I really wanted to read the book "Burning Down the House" which was being made into that movie "21", but since I was unable to find the book sans movie cover ANYWHERE, i gave up all hope on ever reading the book. Sad.

The other problem is that these announcements create a ticking time bomb where by a white person must read the book in ADVANCE of the release of the movie. This is done partly so that they can engage in the popular activity of complaining about how the movie failed to capture the essence of the book. But more importantly, once a book has been made into a movie, a white person can no longer read that book. To have read the book after the movie is one of the great crimes in white culture, and under no circumstances should you ever admit to doing this. Literally dozens of white friendships have imploded when it was revealed that someone read Fight Club after 1999.

I broke my rule once when I was STRANDED at the Dallas Fort Worth Airport and was FORCED to buy "The Other Boleyn Girl" with Natalie Portman and ScarJo on the cover, UGH, THE SHAME! p.s. the book surprisingly didn't suck, I can't say the same for the movie.

Feel Good Song of the Day: Wear Sunscreen

Ok, so it isn't so much a "song", but it has a great message and sometimes you need some extra special fighting words on a Monday AM.

Don't be reckless with other people's hearts, don't put up with
People who are reckless with yours.

Are we surprised?

So the latest is that Jessica Simpson and Tony Romo have split. While I can't say I am surprised, I CAN say that I feel badly for her. She got dumped right before her birthday and for heaven's sake, who the heck knew she was 29!?!

So just remember, you may think your break-ups sucked, but at least you don't have OK magazine doing recaps and photo chronicling.

Friends like Mine are Priceless

Example 1: Em signs on prior to taking a Mock Bar Exam just to say "Hi", evidenced below:

Em: Elle!!

Elle: HIII

Em: i am signing off for three hours

but

i hope you have a lovely morning!!!!

Example 2: Big Red is purging her closet of old hand bags and thrifts down a HOT green lizard Kate Spade, even better, she sends a text yest saying she outran a girl in Central Park who was sporting shorts from Mr. Brown's alma mater, that's my girl!

Example 3: Was whisked away this weekend to M & D's house in Southampton. The only thing I had to worry about was whether to BBQ a hot dog or a hamburger and if I should crack open a Blue Moon or Corona. Played tennis, got sun, lounged by the pool. LIFE IS GOOD.

Good friends are invaluable. Mine are priceless.

How To Make Running Fun

So, I love to be in great shape (as in actual shape, not elliptical shape...so I can do stadiums without collapsing from cardiac arrest). However, I do not love to run. I never have, and I probably never will....BUT it is one of those mind over matter things that I force myself to do because afterwards you do feel amazing and there is nothing that can beat the amazing impact it has on you body.

But, if you don't love to run, you definitely need some incentives to get yourself going:

Get New Running Shoes: Find a running store in your area that specializes in running shoes. They will make you walk or run on a treadmill to figure out what kind of shoe will best suit your foot and style. (Check out my cute new asics I just got after literally running holes in my old shoes)

Find A Running Buddy: Running is more a mental exercise than physical- having a friend to run the park with is not only the safer option, it's necessary to have some one to keep you going when you really want to stop.

Adorable Attire: While you are at the running store or any other sports department, pick up some Nike Tempo Running Shorts. They come in a million different colors and are so cute and comfy to run in.

Sign Up For a Race: What better evidence that you have been busting your butt than a collection of racing numbers and times? Whether it is a 5K or a 1/2 marathon, signing up for a race is a good way to keep track of your progress.

I Am Concerned

Brown hair Britney is back. She always gets these horrific, jank brunette weaves right before she goes bat shit crazy.

Too Adorable

Jake and Reese coming home from the gym. Too adorable.

Am I Regressing?

Having just graduated from grad school, I fear I have not become more mature. Rather, since I am studying for the bar exam this summer and not actually going to a job every morning, I have found myself seriously regressing to 17 year old Em. I'll let you be the judge:

Exhibit 1: My highlighter bright nail pink polish. Appropriate for a 25 year old? Probably not. And I don't care. (Also, this Chanel bottle does not even justice to the glare coming off these nails). Lesson: Although bright pink may not be the best color the wear to a job interview, painting on a bright hue on the weekend is NBD and looks amazing when you're tan.

Exhibit 2: After I lost my phone in May (I am an idiot), I finally, FINALLY got a blackberry. First accessory I purchased? Clearly a gummy, pink cover inspired by the cover I saw Julia Allison put on her iphone and very reminiscent of the case I had on my first Nokia cell phone 8 years ago. Obviously, I don't think I'd whip out the pink blackberry in front of a co-worker (the Legally Blond jokes have gotten a bit old, anyways), but what's the big deal with sliding the case back over on the way home or after work hours. Plus: I can ALWAYS find it in the black hole that is my purse.

Exhibit 3: So, I have to make note cards to remember the exciting elements to different legal doctrines...and once my first set of grown up highlighters ran out it occurred to me that I know a much better office supply for the job. That's right: Mr. Sketch. Yes, these are the smelly markers that somehow always end up all over your fingers no matter how careful you are. I love it. My notecards and flowcharts smell of cherry and orange and watermelon and sour apple. Sure, I haven't had these since I was 8, and yes the Office Max check out person gave me a skeptical look...but, really, who cares? Indulging your inner child is sometimes necessary.

Bottom line: During tough times...whether you are studying for a really difficult exam or you have just broken up with your boyfriend or you've had a huge fight with your friend... sometimes doing what makes you happy (even if it isn't exactly age appropriate) is absolutely what you need. Trust me, regressing a bit this summer has made me a lot happier.

How To Tell Your Girlfriend She Is Entering Heifer Territory

Jezebel.com was horrified, but I laughed quite a bit at this AskMen.com article about how men should hint to their girlfriends that they are fat. You shouldn't need your boyfriend to tell you if you've gained some LB's. It's called a mirror.

"For what it's worth: it's never too late or, in my case, too early to be whoever you want to be. There's no time limit, stop whenever you want. You can change or stay the same, there are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. And I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you're proud of. If you find that you're not, I hope you have the strength to start all over again." - The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

Happy Friday! Wishing you all a good weekend, a great weekend, hey, maybe even the best weekend. The thing about great days and great moments is that they sneak up on you, you never know you are about to have a great day until you are right in the middle of it.

XO - Elle

Thank you for being a friend

Tell your friends how much they mean to you, and do it often. Kind words are like a sprinkle of speed in your coffee, you don't want to ask for it, but if its there, OH-HAPPY-DAY!

Now come on, say it with me:

Quick Sitemeter Lesson

So, I know that when we have tossed around the word "Sitemeter" before, those who are less tech savvy/ or have never had a Myspace page, are like...whhhhat? Here is a quick lesson so (1) You know no matter how anonymous you think the web is, it's really not and (2) So you stay safe.

Quick Lesson 1: Most blogs have embedded an HTML code (I apologize for Geek speak) in their websites which tell them who has been visiting their website and how they are getting there. Example: A sitemeter will tell the blog host if X person is coming to the website by googling something like "Do You Fancy Us" or "How To Decode a Drunk Dial" etc. The Sitemeter also will let the know blog host know if the visitor is getting to the website through a link from another site OR if if the visitor is merely typing the website name into their browser.

Quick Lesson 2: Each router/modem is characterized by an individual IP address (AKA, they don't repeat. This is often how cops find individuals who have child porn on their computer. Seriously). So, if you were sitting in a coffee shop, you and the guy across the store from you would be sharing the same IP address. Same thing goes if you are accessing internet from a school or an office which has registered their IP. The IP will read a bunch of numbers and often be followed by something like (university.edu) or (Partner and Partner LLC). Scary right?

Quick Lesson 3: Often IP's also tell you the general location where the internet is coming from and the longitude and latitude. Example: it will list the city, state and country like Kansas City, Missouri, United States. Sometimes, however, the IP address won't register a location. Don't be too excited. There are lots of websites like this one where all you have to do is copy and paste an IP address and it will spit out more information than the sitemeter did in the first place. If you don't believe me, click the link and it will tell your IP and everything else you want to know about your IP identity.

Quick Lesson 4: Lastly, each IP visit is individually time stamped and lets the blog host know how long you have been there as well as what links you have clicked on the page. So, for example, if you make a comment one someone's website, the blog host will probably (unless the volume of visitors is over 1,000 and hour) know (1) Your IP, (2) Where you live (3) What operating system you use (aka do you have a MAC or a PC, do you use Safari/Google Chrome/Fire Fox/Internet Explorer) (4) and maybe even what law firm/office or school you are accessing the site from.

Bottom line: Be safe and careful, and remember that everything is not as anonymous as it seems.

Feel Good Mantra of the Day

Keep Calm and Carry On. Say it with me.

Big Red just bought this poster online the other day in hopes that it will make her work space more peaceful, its currently under going a custom frame job, so we'll see how effective it is upon hanging. Don't sweat the small stuff, better yet, don't sweat (ew smelly).

I miss theme parties

Former sorority girls never lose the deep seeded love they once had for theme parties, it merely gets repressed. As we get older we reduce our selves to Tacky Holiday Sweater Parties, and Super Bowl Sunday, and this, quite frankly, is unacceptable.

• Oktoberfest! Dressing up like a German Beer Hall gal and carrying steins of quality beer will make it impossible for your guy friends to say no, and quite frankly, why would they want to?
• Cinco De Mayo! Throw a fiesta at your abode, require some festive attire and whip up a batch of guac.
• Oscar Party! Make Oscar attire or a character from a nominated movie required and make themed goodies.
  
• 4th of July! So you may have missed the boat this year, but next year require Red-white-and/or-blue attire. Make red white and blue margs and celebrate how awesome America is.
  

In case you aren't seeing a pattern, forcing people to dress to the verge of ridiculousness dramatically enhances EVERYONE's fun.

Very Guilty Pleasure

Oh, Itunes, how you throw music I shouldn't enjoy in my face. But seriously, Ashley Tisdale has some super catchy work out tunes out right now for 99 cents....which these days is a bargain (I tried to download an old school, slightly obscure Journey song today and it was $1.29. I was outraged).

So judge me. But download. My favorite: 'Overrated'

"Revenge is a Dish Best Served Cold"... and on the good china!

An angry creature is not always the most rational creature and its quite easy to want to lash out when we feel angry, spurned or slighted. Telling the world that your ex-best friend's diet secret is actually laxatives and not core yoga may make you feel better temporarily, putting up a facebook album of you having the faux time of your life post break up may make you feel confident and empowered, but the truth of the matter is this: the best revenge is being the best version of yourself. Some people may tell you, "Oh, don't stoop to their level", hmmm, how about a different mindset, such as "Oh, I am sorry, I didn't see you all the way down there. I was far too busy being fabulous."



Work out, eat healthy, SMILE, blast MJ's "Man in the Mirror" when you get ready in the morning (trust me, it works), stand up straight, wake up 5 minutes early and make your hair look extra perfect when you walk out the door, heels may seem unpractical and relgating weekday footwear to ballet flats may be easy, but we all know our legs look SO much better in heels. 90% of our attitude is how we react to the crappy stuff happening to us, so own up to the things you can control. It may seem like some days the global community has conspired against you, it hasn't. Your day starts and ends with you.

MAKE IT WORK! LET IT ROCK!

Goodbye.

I am sick of writing about break-ups, really, you may find that hard to believe. At first it was cathartic, and now it just feels cliched and sad (sad like pathetic, not sad like tears). I am trying with every ounce of my being to be forward moving, and happy and positive, but it IS SERIOUSLY beginning to feel like I am being tested. So, Mr. Brown returns my remaining belongings with the speed of Usain Bolt, like could he BE any more excited to purge himself of my personal items? Next he plasters an album on Facebook displaying all the fun he is having, "Summer 2009" . I haven't even bothered to look at it, my team (the most amazing friends life could ask for) gave me the heads up.



So here are some thoughts I am having (in no particular order...):

He is a transparent idiot
He is an insensitive fool
He does not know THE RULES OF PROPER RELATIONSHIP TERMINATION ETIQUETTE
I feel like I am being punished
• I feel like *I* did the breaking up and he is showing off
  
I know I am a bitch, but Karma... EASE UP
On the bright side, it is very difficult to be sad when my first feelings are RAGE and HOSTILITY
I am trying to be positive and up beat and forward-moving but for fucks sake, its like i am being tested AT EVERY POSSIBLE TURN.
• Ya know what? You pathetic ass, I am much tougher than this and if you need to parade yourself on Facebook, well then, you are a fraction of the man I thought you were.
• Lastly, I am really beginning to feel that you aren't the person I thought you were AT ALL and I never really knew you.

So this is it, this is my last post on the subject. He isn't worth the salt in my tears (which I have yet to cry) or the future rheumatism from the angry typing.

Workout Moves from Hollywood's Best Trainers

Homeless?

I usually find Bradley Cooper attractive, but what the hell is going on with his hair?

Think Reese: Reinvent Yourself

Ed note: I wrote this post way back in August about break-ups, but I think it is time for a repost (with a few edits). We will do this from time to time when we feel something we have written before deserve a breath of fresh air. Have a comment? Click below or e-mail us. Enjoy:

A few years ago, when Reese Witherspoon and Ryan Phillipe split, the tabloids were shocked that Hollywood's golden couple was dunzo (as was I- I still have the 'wtf' e-mail from Elle delivering the news).

However- after the storm died, do you remember what was splashed all over Us Weekly and People? It wasn't how shitty Reese looked, or omg Reese looks like she's about to cut herself.

Nope...it was how down right FABULOUS Reese looked at the Golden Globes- new body, new haircut, new Reese. Let this be a lesson. Break-ups tend to have different effects on different people- some people it inspires to head for the fridge for a carton of chunky monkey and others cannot stomach the idea of comfort food. Either way, take a que from Reese and opt for the 'reinvention'.

Now, I am not suggesting you go crazy and chop off your hair or go on a hunger strike (in fact, I have already had the discussion with my hair stylist, that no matter HOW crazily emotional I seem- she is NOT to ever cut my hair above a certain length...this was after several failed tries at hair reinvention after a break-up -which needless to say, did not go well). The point is, take the focus OFF him and onto YOU. Face it, he has made it clear he is number one- and guess what, so are you. Get skinny, change you hair, try out that style he always smirked at. Find a new joie de vivre.

Look what good it did for Reese. Hello, is she not toting adorable Jake Gyllenhall around? We'll just say it: UPGRADE.

The Difference Between Men and Women (re: office supplies)

I have been studying for the bar exam, so clearly office supplies have become an even more important part of my life than they already were (that's not saying much, but you get my point).

Anyways, I am down to my last ugly Sharpie highlighters (aka, not the Liquid Sharpies. If Office Max is your Mecca, you understand me), I open the top of the orange to highlight something I'm sure is very important and I see this NUB. Obviously, OBVIOUSLY, Mr. Em has been using this highlighter. I MEAN SERIOUSLY. How does this happen?! Also please note, the blue highlighter which I have been using, and it's perfect, unblemished edge. I am deeply disturbed.

Also, please note the cup of Tazo Alive tea in the background. Just a bite of caffeine and perfect to get the day going!

Vixen Inspiration: Scarlett O'Hara

Tough. Manipulative. Strong. Indefatigable. Sassy. Spry. Beautiful. Vain. Confident. If she can survive a couple of husbands, the loss of a child, the burning of Tara, losing the only man she ever loved, and THE CIVIL WAR, um, I am PRETTAY sure I can survive this. Scarlett is the example of not just surviving or existing, but fighting and thriving.

ScarHar - Hats off to you

Breakup Tip of the Day - Embrace the Love

I don't like being fawned over. I don't like having to check in with people (Friends, Mom, bf, etc.). I don't like having my sanity/ emotional stability/ self-esteem called into question. I like to think I am quite independent and capable of taking care of myself, so the past week with emails, texts, and calls flowing like bubbly on New Years, I felt overwhelmed and it made me question if in fact I AM actually as ok as I am telling everyone I am. I realize that I am half forcing a reality, as if I tell myself enough times that I am ok that it will actually be true. The calls and g-chats aren't questioning me or second guessing me, they are just letting me know that if I have a human moment, they are there to help me out.

Sometimes its hard to admit you need help, or that you aren't as together as you letting on, but if you can't admit that to your family and best friends, who can you admit it to? I promise, they aren't judging, so surround yourself with the people who have seen you at your worst and deserve you at your best.

Fact: Life goes on. Day 7, I made it one whole week.

Then and Now

Awww, I still love Matt Damon and Ben Affleck (FYI to Brody Jenner, this was the first bromance). Above, screen shot from Good Will Hunting from 1997. Below, playing at a charity poker tournament benefitting Africa from last week.

Happy One Year To DYFU!

Happy Birthday America!

And that's about all I have to say tonight. Except for one thing. The past few days when I've been at that window upstairs, I've thought a bit of the "shining city upon a hill." The phrase comes from John Winthrop, who wrote it to describe the America he imagined. What he imagined was important because he was an early Pilgrim, an early freedom man. He journeyed here on what today we'd call a little wooden boat; and like the other Pilgrims, he was looking for a home that would be free.

I've spoken of the shining city all my political life, but I don't know if I ever quite communicated what I saw when I said it. But in my mind it was a tall proud city built on rocks stronger than oceans, wind-swept, God-blessed, and teeming with people of all kinds living in harmony and peace, a city with free ports that hummed with commerce and creativity, and if there had to be city walls, the walls had doors and the doors were open to anyone with the will and the heart to get here. That's how I saw it and see it still.- Ronald Reagan

Happy 4th!

America's greatest strength, and its greatest weakness, is our belief in second chances, our belief that we can always start over, that things can be made better.

4th of July is by far Em & mine's fave holiday... EVER. Who doesn't love summer, America, navy, or BBQ's? Anyways, heading out for some beach, sun and relaxation with some friends this weekend. And remember, Independence day isn't just a time to feel grateful for being in America, its the perfect time to reflect on the abundance of things we have to be thankful for. After the week I have had, its become evident that the pursuit of happiness is a trip we take on our own, and we owe it to ourselves and to those who paved the way before us to be the best version of ourselves that we can.

XO - Elle

Breakup Tip of the Day - Get a new scent

Buy new perfume/ body wash/ shampoo. Memory is strongly tied to scent, so why not start clean and start fresh with a scent completely devoid of any "old you", the you that was a "we".

This tip came in from Mommy Elle who sent an ASAP care package complete with new perfume, because sometimes you need to " wash that Man right out my Hair"

Retro

Love these picture of the 90's Super Models. SO much more beautiful that the girls walking down the runways today.

"That is the ugliest f-ing skirt I've ever seen. " Part 4

Ugly shit is back. So I know we've been on the positive train, but these shoes are so ugly that they make me laugh, and isn't laughing a positive thing? All ugly shit via ModCloth, who normally has fairly cute things, their footwear however is veto central.

Healthy Pesto Recipe from Woman's Health Magazine

Try this healthy Pesto Recipe from Women's Health Mag (this measurement is for 6 servings; if you want to switch it up click on the link and put in your desired serving):

Ingredients

Serves: Prep: 5min|Cook: 0min |Total: 5min

• 2 cups chopped fresh basil
• 1 cup dry bread crumbs
• 3 tablespoons grated Parmesan cheese
• 2 tablespoons chopped almonds
• 2 cloves garlic
• 1/4 cup nonfat mayonnaise
• 1/4 cup nonfat sour cream

Directions

1.

In a blender or food processor, combine the basil, bread crumbs, Parmesan, almonds, and garlic. Process until smooth, scraping down the sides of the container as necessary. Add the mayonnaise and sour cream. Process briefly to combine.

Nutritional Facts per serving

CALORIES

116.1 CAL

FAT

3.2 G

SATURATED FAT

0.8 G

CHOLESTEROL

4 MG

SODIUM

268.1 MG

CARBOHYDRATES

17.6 G

TOTAL SUGARS

2.4 G

DIETARY FIBER

1.9 G

PROTEIN

4.6 G

Grateful :)

The mark of a good friendship is that no matter how many miles are in between or how many days have gone since last speaking, you know in your heart you can call them at anytime and they will be there for you.

Sometimes it isn't until you hit an emotional bottom (or um...until you are thrown there...) that you see all the people who want to help pick up back up. So while I am keeping the G-Chats and emails short in order to prevent a complete emotional collapse at work, I am so grateful that I have people in my life who are there for me.

Five Love Lessons From “Gone With The Wind”

Re-blogged from The Frisky

Today marks the 73rd anniversary of the publishing of Margaret Mitchell’s epic Civil War novel, Gone With The Wind. I’ve read the book 20 times (that’s 20,960 pages in total, y’all!), watched the movie at least a dozen times, and have gleaned numerous lessons, particularly about relationships, with the turn of every page. I’ll share, after the jump…

1. Flirt: With anything and everything, because you can. Scarlett O’Hara, in my opinion, was kind of feminist for her day. She flirted and wore her sexuality with pride, questioning what it mean to be a lady, not caring what the other more uptight and judgmental women thought.

2. Keep Your Friends (If You Have Them) Close And Your Enemies Closer: Scarlett wanted Ashley Wilkes like nothing else, but when he opted to marry Melanie instead of her, she did what any headstrong Southern lady would do. She married Melanie’s brother Charles so she could be part of their inner circle.

3. Blood Is Thicker Than Water: So steal your sister’s man, because she’ll eventually have to forgive you, because you’re family. After Charles died in the war and Scarlett was left pretty much destitute, she tried to woo Rhett Butler, who was profiting from the war. When he rejected her, she stole her sister’s beau, Frank, who was also doing well financially. Bitch gotta eat!

4. How To Make A Man Jealous: Marry someone infinitely more handsome and smarter. I don’t think there is a woman on the planet who has read Gone With The Wind and actually understands what Scarlett sees in balding, wimpy, mealy-mouthed Ashley, when that fox Rhett Butler is standing right in front of her. However, when Scarlett finally wed Rhett, her beloved Ashley finally turned green with envy. Charles and Frank weren’t real competition, but against Rhett, Ashley knew he paled in comparison.

5. Appreciate What You’ve Got: Before it’s too late. At the end of GWTW, after Melanie dies, leaving Ashley free to be with Scarlett (if he could possibly muster up the testosterone to pursue her for reals), Rhett walks out and Scarlett realizes she loves him. But, frankly my dears, he didn’t give a damn.

Additional Life Lessons:

• Do not let your small child ride a horse side saddle. She will fall and die just like Bonnie Blue Butler.
• Do get an epidural during childbirth. Melanie was in so much pain!
• Drapes make for amazing DIY dress fabric, especially in green velvet.
• If he drags you up to the bedroom kicking and screaming for sex, it’s totes rape. I don’t care that Scarlett seemed all glowing the next morning!
• Trust the local whore—Belle Watling helped save the hides of Ashley and his cronies when they got in trouble for attending a KKK meeting.
• Oh yeah, seriously, don’t fraternize with KKK members. They are trouble.

Feel Good Song of the Day: Tiny Spark

"Tiny Spark" by Brendan Benson. Its light, its happy, and it sounds like summer.